This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
soo... how was my night?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize