worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
