You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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