: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
