K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
