i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
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