Grow some girl-balls and come out already
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
