I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
40s are totally the cure
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
