He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Randomize
