got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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