Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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