found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
