His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
