We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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