it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
we made out on top of his cat.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I am one with the molecules
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
