the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
tell your sister to shave her snatch
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
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