some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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