did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
