Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize