I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Randomize
