I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
