what day is it and did you see me today?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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