He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
