I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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