So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Randomize
