What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
