I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
