Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
