Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
