So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
