I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
