just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
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