You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
