Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Randomize
