Fuck appropriateness.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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