this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
