The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I wish i was in the wii world.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize