mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
