She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
