I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize