I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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