you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
