Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
the day after is always just damage control
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
