Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
