You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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