I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
