hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Just cropdusted the office
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
We're too hungover to prance.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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