She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Randomize
