let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
