Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
