Jerry, you need to find god
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Randomize
