would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Randomize
